Category: calculus

So, what are the units on this one? Corn Units…

So, what are the units on this one? Corn Units per centimeter.

The Witch of Agnesi. Is it Agnesi or AgNESi? L…

The Witch of Agnesi. Is it Agnesi or AgNESi? Like the Lock Ness Monster? The hump is Nessy coming out of the water.

When doing the chain rule, ignore the inside b…

When doing the chain rule, ignore the inside because it’s just garbage. Don’t bother with garbage.

When I was thinking about the questions of the…

When I was thinking about the questions of the test, I was also deeply thinking about every one of you.

From now on, you can only use L’Hopital’…

From now on, you can only use L’Hopital’s rule twice per semester, and you’ll have to ask me first!

Concepts of calculus will serve you well in an…

Concepts of calculus will serve you well in any future occupation; it is a new way for the brain to process thoughts.

As my sophomore calculus professor used to say…

As my sophomore calculus professor used to say, ‘you couldn’t be wronger.’

I am never going to hold office hours in my of…

I am never going to hold office hours in my office. The building is scary. The pipes leak. And, worst of all, it is full of other mathematicians.

There’s just so much math that I know that you…

There’s just so much math that I know that you don’t even have the vocabulary for me to describe to you. It’s like … It’s like if you as students are fetuses in the womb and I’m trying to explain with post-birth life is like to you. You just can’t conceptualize that.

Conversation

Calculus Professor: Class, what happens when we distribute exponents to addition inside parentheses?
Student: We go to hell.
Calculus Professor: That’s right! A very special place in hell.